Running Advice from a Knucklehead

Good Monday morning to you all!  There’s nothing like jumping into the work week Cannonball style: butt first.  It’s my favorite way to start any project that might not seem quite as appealing in theory.

And what a great weekend of NFL Playoff Football!  Even though my Honolulu Blue and Silver Detroit Lions are on their off-season, I am still fully engaged in the race for the Super Bowl.  I have family in the Baltimore area, so Ray-Ray – it’s on!  GAME TIME!

So what’s got me pumped up this morning?  I had a conversation with a good friend who is looking to take up running after having her second baby.  She asked for some advice, and without hesitation I took up the challenge!

Seeing as I’m not a trained professional, a personal trainer, or authorized to give medical advice (in this country, anyways), I have researched programs from those who do qualify to give recommendations on running programs.  But just because I have literally stumbled through my own adventures in running doesn’t take away from the fact that I have advice to offer.  I mean, I have competed in over five 5Ks and one Boilermaker Road Race and lived to sign up for a second.  So to you my dear Fancy Oatmeal readers, I offer my top five tips for running.

5. You’re not 13 anymore; it’s ok to add padding to your bra!

Ok, so it’s not a box of tissue, but any type of anti-chafe salve is going to save the skin in your ta-ta’s area, and let’s face it, that’s territory worth saving.  You’ll never know the importance of adding this product in your gym bag until you’re standing under the shower faucet, and water STINGS THE @&%$!* out of the hidden rawness of your shoulders, cleavage, and bra strap area.

4. Throw out the 1200 calorie diet – running is a good excuse to eat like you’re 10 1/2 months pregnant!

Ok, so you can’t go wild with this one, but you’ll be AMAZED at how your appetite will increase as you log miles.  And let’s face it, whether you’re trying to lose weight or not, that metabolism peak is in the top five “bumps” in a woman’s life.

3.  Become a runner stalker to your friends and family.

I wrote a piece earlier about why runners share their successes, and it’s NOT because we’re narcissists.  It’s because once you let other people know what your goals are, they will support you.  You will have a few pooh-poohers, but that’s usually just jealousy and THEIR issue, not yours.  Tell your friends that you’re planning on running on Saturday, and maybe you’ll have a few running partners.

2. Carry a towel.

It could be for wiping up your sweat or your tears, but for whatever substance you end up wiping away, you’ll be thankful you have it.


That’s the best piece of advice for any runner, beginner or maestro of the mileage.  If you walk 95% of the 3.1 miles and jog 5%, you’re still doing it!  Tie up your shoes, pull up your shorts, lube on your anti-chafe goop, and put one foot in front of the other.

11 thoughts on “Running Advice from a Knucklehead

  1. I snorted my coffee to the Yogurtland picture. 🙂 My friend calls me a “predatory runner” because I’m always asking people how far they run and their approximate pace and when they’re planning on running. It’s not out of being competitive, though, I’m just looking for others to commiserate with on long, cold winter runs! And to be mutually encouraging. So, onward, predatory runners!

  2. You mentioned me in your blog! I feel so special – Big Smile – seriously, like a rockstar just called out my name from the stage! And thanks for those tips… I am sure that when the time does come for me to take on the challenge of running the “over the shoulder boulder holder” tools will be a life saver! 🙂 I cant wait to share my journey into running with you! yay!

  3. Love these tips – especially the importance of supporting each other (I call it a “running buddy”) and Just Do It. Although it is an overused cliche, it’s full of wisdom. I use my brother as my “running buddy” – even though my husband is a runner. I would add two things – These tips work could work for any exercising and to find your goal / motivation. For me it is hitting my yearly mileage goal. For others, it may be something else not related to running at all. My coworker just joined a gym and her motivation is that she is paying for the gym membership. I ask her about it a lot – not to be annoying but to hopefully encourage her.

    • I know a few people who use the “I am paying money for this, so I better use it” excuse/motivation to hit the gym/treadmill. It is helping Dear Hubby a bit to know that we shelled out a lot of dough to have it shipped to our island. Whatever gets you moving!

  4. Pingback: Who Needs a Trainer When I’ve Got Pinterest? « Fancy Oatmeal

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